Overcoming unforgiveness, what a relief.

I'm not a grudge-holder. I don't do silent treatments or blacklists and I can't stand it when people do that to me. I rarely get offended or angry and certainly can't stay that way. It's just not the way I'm wired. So, it was quite a surprise to me when I got to the chapter on Overcoming Unforgiveness in Beth Moore's book, Praying God's Word. I honestly thought I could skip over the chapter because, like I implied, I'd rather have a root canal than be in disagreement with someone. I thought I could skip it, of course, until I started reading it. Isn't it always the way? Satan seems to go after us in the areas we think we're strongest. I may not be one to huff and puff, but after reading Beth's words, I have learned that I'm good at holding grudges in my heart. I've allowed plenty of past hurts to take residence there and creep back out in bitter words and thoughts from time to time. I have allowed these things to make me feel worthy of basking in self-pity when I was having a "woe is me" kind of day. I really wasn't the super-forgiver I thought I was.

I didn't realize that this spirit of unforgiveness that I was harboring was really a stronghold between God and I. He wants us to forgive; after-all, we aren't the judge of others wrong-doings, He is. Beth Moore says it better than I ever could in the following paragraph taken from Praying God's Word (pg. 220),

"Innumerable strongholds are connected to an unwillingness to forgive. Left untreated, unforgiveness becomes spiritual cancer. Bitterness takes root, and since the root feeds the rest of the tree, every branch of our lives and every fruit on each limb ultimately become poisoned. Beloved sister or brother, the bottom line is...unforgiveness makes us sick. Always spiritually. Often emotionally. And, surprisingly often, physically." 

Beth goes on to describe forgiveness as "letting something go to God" as opposed to the "feeling" we think it is. She says, "[f]orgiveness is the ongoing act by which we agree with God over the matter, practice the mercy He's extended to us, and surrender the situation, the repercussions, and the hurtful person to Him."

Let me tell you something, friends. Since reading this chapter, I've put her definition of forgiveness into practice and it works. Of course, I do catch myself trying to harbor things from time to time, but now I'm quick(er) to cast them out. It's somewhat therapeutic to carry burdens around only to hash and re-hash. Sadly, that kind of therapy is about as effective as scarfing down some ice cream sundaes to cast away hurt. Neither way works. The best way to forgive is to surrender the situation, as Beth said. It will show Christlikeness and open space in your heart for more virtues, fewer strongholds.

What a relief.
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^{This post is listed on the Time Warp Wife's Titus2sday blog link-up. Please head over to Darlene's site to check out all of the awesome blogs linked up today!}