Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Do you even know who you are??

Here's something maybe like, one or two of you can relate to... 

When I was in my 20s, I was very career-minded. So career-minded, in fact, that I pretty much just worked, ate, and slept. Through college and early adulthood, I dumped all my hobbies; lots of friendships; and basically just put my nose to the grindstone day-in and day-out to bust out some goals and benchmarks and all that other corporate bologna. And, when I wasn't working, I was thinking about my next career move and my next degree - which never happened because every time I started a masters or licensure program, I ended up being pregnant again. I think God was trying to clue me in and I just wasn't getting it. At any rate, when I was so incredibly, unbelievably, amazingly please don't ever ever make me go back to work blessed to quit my job and the end of 2011...I came home to be with my kids, full-time! 

And pretty soon after my first day as a stay-at-home-mom, I was all..."What the crap am I going to do now?" I haven't been unemployed for more than a couple weeks time since I was SIXTEEN. Who. Am. I. 

What. The. Crap. 
And, when I say "what am I going to do?" I don't mean - "what am I going to do every day?" Though I did have a lot of make-up work to do when it came to full-time parenting. I mean, in the event that I do get second to sit down, what are my hobbies? What do I even like to do now besides drink coffee and wear yoga pants? I know. So basic. It had been SO LONG since I did anything besides work, I kind of really didn't know what to do with myself outside normal parental duties. 

More coffee, anyone? 

It was just a strange awakening of sorts and I had to re-figure out my interests. I love music, so my iPod was quickly filled with things to listen to. I started this blog because, duh, I paid a lot of money to get an English degree. Might as well use it. And then, one day, when my kids were doing some art projects at the kitchen table and instead of asking them, every five seconds, to mind their messes I sat down with them. I quickly remembered the hours and hours I spent while growing up (and I mean every day for hours) drawing to pass time or to wind-down. I noticed our oldest daughter's love for art - and she is really good at it! It felt great to encourage her as she created. My love for drawing came back seemingly at once. Our art closet was soon filled with notepads and pens and a bazillion markers and paints; trips to Michael's were many and my Pinterest boards were overflowing with ideas.

Zentangle drawing with Pitt Pens 

I absolutely love drawing. I love that it's something I can do to wind down and share with my kids as they wind down as well. We love creating together even if we are working on separate projects. There's just something about being in community, working alongside one another, and putting our imaginations on paper. The conversation is good. The outcome is always fun to see, analyze, and discuss. I love seeing what our kids come up with. It helps me understand them even better. We get to talk about all of the art-lovers in our family and all of the different kinds of art in the world. I'm not into sports and, at 33, there's really no chance of that changing. BUT, every one of our kids from the oldest to youngest loves art. I am so glad that's something we can share and do together. 

Zentangle with Pitt Pens and Prismacolor Markers
A lot of times, we have been in career-mode or mom-mode for SO LONG that we simply forget our own interests and who God made us to be. I'm not talking about having some mid-life independent woman freakout. It's not that at all. Remember the gifts you've been given and share those with your children! Let them see your abilities and how you work to improve; get them involved, too. It's a great way to tighten the parent/child bonds, promote community, discipline and it opens doors for communication as well. So, whatever your interests (so long as they are constructive and age-appropriate, that is) share them with your kids! Chances are, they will share some of the same and it will draw you closer, still. 
Free-style drawing and lettering with watercolor pencils and Pitt Pens. 

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