Still working on my PhD, at the School of Hard Knocks!!

You guys, I've told you about my anxiety problems and how I hate feeling out of control. My word. Yesterday was off-the-hook out of control, it seemed!

After dropping our daughter off at school, I scratched the side of my nose and you'd think someone stabbed me in the face. Blood everywhere and no tissue or paper towel to be found. Within twenty or so minutes of being home, I found our downstairs toilet clogged (and getting with in 10ft of a toilet plunger is NOT something an OCD-prone person wants to do - GROSS!). After unclogging the toilet, I got dressed in a hurry and rushed out the door to pass out yard sale flyers with a friend. She was taking care of some extra littles yesterday, but we decided an outing would be an adventure. We took eight littles, ages five and under, around the neighborhood, to stuff yard sale flyers in 80+ mailboxes. This is the point when I was wishing I knew some pre-school teacher tricks. Pre-school teachers are amazing and always know how to control an army of little people in any situation. Winds were gusting, flyers were flying through the air and I was chasing them (with a baby riding on my back) while my friend kept the other littles in line. Despite all of the variables stacked against our situation - it turned out well and only a few neighbors stared.

When we returned home, I began cleaning and managed to knock my head (hard) on the corner of a table. A little while later, we sat down to have a late lunch and relax a moment. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the wind catch our outdoor umbrella and launch our heavy metal patio table (and six metal chairs) through the air, only to watch it all crash down the stairs of our deck. Glass everywhere and the table is a lost cause. It's always something, right? We'll be finding that glass forever. About 2pm, I realized my pants were on backwards and had been all day. I thought to myself, "it figures." And proceded with my cleaning (without fixing my pants - you know, what did it really matter at this point?). 

The rest of the afternoon seemed to be going well. The two big kids were resting, our oldest was playing at her friend's house and the baby was napping happily upstairs. I decided to take advantage of the quiet time and bake some (clean) cookies. As they were cooling, the cooling rack decided to hop off the counter - cookies and melted chocolate all over the kitchen floor. Awesome. I needed to mop anyway, right? Right. That mess was all cleaned up and it was about time for our company to come for dinner. I opened the oven door to put our salmon in when I saw something unexpected - the last batch of cookies was still in the oven. And, I'd totally burnt the tar out of them re-baked them. So, half a dozen cookies were sacrificed by the cooling rack and the others were turned to stone due to my negligence. Ok, we don't need sweets anyway. Next?

About twenty minutes later, I opened the oven door to take the salmon out. Guess what? Our not-so-cheap stoneware pan was completely split in two. OY! At least the fish was ok, but our poor pan!! We ate our dinner and had a great time with our friends without further incident. Around 9:30, the kids were all settled into bed and just as I felt that you-made-it-through-another-day feeling, I heard the cough. You know, the one that procedes you-know-what... That's right, a kid threw up (a bunch). And, in addition, the baby woke up with a fever (and then woke up again and again and again and again and peed all over me, through her PJs, when her diaper decided to leak sometime around 2 a.m.). We both got a wardrobe change and then went back to bed.

This morning, so far so good. And, you know what...it's all ok. Many, many things happened that were out of my control yesterday. I couldn't stop pans from busting, kids from vomiting, or the winds from gusting - but God ordained it all, and for that we're blessed and can be joyful still knowing that He is sovereign in everything! Amidst the craziness of yesterday, I was able to capture the picture of two of our daughters (right) and was reminded of how blessed we (all) are by little, every day moments and getting to realize the joy of those moments. Sometimes when everything seems to be going wrong, we need to look around and praise God for all the things that really do go right, and often un-noticed.

I want to be crafty, I really do.

We mean it. 

I guess writing and photography are "crafty," but, you know, I want to be a DIY girl! I want to use sandpaper and spray paint to turn crap from the thrift store into something magnifique! I want to mod podge to the moon and hack Ikea furniture into a new dimension. Sadly, it's just not happening for me yet. Today is no exception.

One of my out-of-town friends is coming for a playdate tomorrow with her three precious boys. Of course, I run around the house looking for all those things that make us look like rednecks things that need a little sprucing up to be presentable. One of those things was our no soliciting sign. In an effort to keep people away from our freaking doorbell at nap time, I took a piece of the kids' construction paper, a sharpie, and some packing tape and made a big ugly NO SOLICITING sign. Nothing says, "WE DON'T WANT ANY," like some chicken scratch on dark green paper covered with packing tape, right?! Right.

Anywho. One of my new neighbors and I were having a discussion about solicitors one day and I told her that a simple sign has really deterred them for us. Well, my sweet new neighbor decided to come check out our sign before making her own (face --> palm). She said she was sure I'd have something cutesy because I seem like the crafty type. Oh, I wish, dear neighbor.

Because I don't want one more person to look at our tacky sign, I decided it was time to get something more permanent in line. I thought about buying one from Etsy, but why?! Let's do something Pinteresting instead, right!? Let's be frugal. Let's use our right brains. Let's show the girls that we can be industrious. Right... My oldest daughter and I strolled through the craft store this evening as ideas for this sign reeled through my head. My first thought was to paint it on wood...but then how would I get a hole in the wood to hang it? Did this store even have nails or screws to hang the thing? How am I going to put a nail in the door? What kind of paint do I get? Now I have to buy brushes? What kind of brushes? How long is this going to take to dry? This is going to cost a million bajillion dollars. My crafts really have to take 20 minutes or less; if not, I get frustrated, throw them out and order something online...usually what I should have done in the first place.

See what I mean, people?

Anyway. As my budding artist daughter and I walked through the store, I finally found something do-able. I found a porcelain sign (the right size) and SCORE, it already had holes and some ropey looking stuff through the holes. All I'd have to do is write on it! Back to the paint aisle...

Ah, color choices. I can't take it. After zoning-out in the midst of about 857 Martha Stewart paint colors, I saw a happy compromise - paint markers. Wahoo! I know how to write, there are multiple colors, $5.99 - let's go! I still didn't know how I was going to hang the dang thing, but at least 90% of the problem was solved (or so I thought).

We get to the checkout and I see 3M command hooks. Wahoo! Problem solved. Even I can stick a plastic hook to the door.

So, the story continues at home...after all this ridiculousness - spacing, lettering, erasing, more spacing, more lettering, more erasing, I finally get the sign finished. I stick the 3M hook on the door and, of course, it's too low. I go to take the hook off and it flys across the room, in two pieces, and I am thankful that there are more of those adhesive strips so I can try again. I'm holding the baby all the while and hanging this thing up one-handed, btw. Finally, the sign is hung and I post a photo online.

See my error? Grrr!

Thirty seconds later.

My pal Allison comments; there's a spelling error. Dag nabit. I looked at the thing a million times, knew it didn't look right, but couldn't figure it out. This is what happens when you have kids, I tell you!! The basics start to get trippy. I have an English degree for crying out loud. I should certainly be able to find a spelling error!

Post deleted.

I flip the thing over, scratch off the price tag, write it all out again, stick on the flowers AND DONE. Next time ordering something from Etsy may be the best use of my time and I'll be teaching the girls about opportunity cost. Maybe I'll stick to blogging and making messes in the kitchen, my safe places.


And, at least I got some blog fodder out of it. Otherwise, you'd have to hear about the other things I did today, like getting Rotel tomatoes and chiles in my eye or wearing cabbage on my head for kicks.

Trendy, no?

Short Mom Syndrome

Maybe these will do the trick.

We were at a festival over the weekend when a crowd of teenagers was being a little too noisy/rowdy around my littles. I looked their direction with my piercing mom-eyes activated to let them know they needed to back away and quiet down. FAIL. My mom-eyes had no effect because these kids were all WAY taller than this mama. Oy. That's when I realized that, someday, my littles will likely be bigger than me, too - my oldest daughter especially.

Imagine my shock when my kids' pediatrician told us that our oldest daughter would likely be between 5"9 and 5"11. Wait...what??? If you know me personally, you know that I'm basically tall enough not to have to ride in a booster seat in the car. So....having tall(er) children can be somewhat of a struggle sometimes. Even if the pediatrician's estimate is off, there's no chance she's not going to tower over me. Right now, I have a 6 year-old who is up to my shoulders. That means, I can't easily pick her up; it's a serious struggle to carry her upstairs; I can't keep her still very easily and, before long, I'm going to have to use a step-stool when I fix her hair in the morning. On the plus side, she will be able to reach things in high places for me someday. Later on she'll also be able to wear all those awesome tall person maxi dresses, ballet flats, and skinny jeans that I can't wear and I will live vicariously through her wardrobe.

Or these.

Sigh...

So, my question to you, fellow short moms, have you had any difficulties managing a kid that's as tall or taller than you? I know it's not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things, but I want to prepare in advance. :)